If you think you're too busy to read this, this one's for YOU!!

Have you ever had this conversation before..?

"Oh hey, how’s things?" 

"I’m good thanks, but just so busy!"

Sound familiar?

Everyone is busy, busy, busy. We hear things like this all the time: "I’m really busy right now"; "I don’t have time to do that"; "there’s not enough hours in the day"; "I’m exhausted"; "I don’t know how I’m going to fit all this in"; "I’m stressed because I’m so busy". 

You may not see it, but underlying these sentiments is a sense that being 'busy' makes us feel important. But that feeling comes at a price; operating this way for too long is stretching you to your limits, and being stretched to your limit for an extended period of time leads to many negative outcomes, including burnout. 

I’m gonna put it out there.. I think being busy is the curse of the 21st Century.

There, I said it! 

It was once {now laughingly} suggested that with the introduction of PC’s to the workplace, we would have so much time on our hands that we wouldn’t know what to do with ourselves {NB: I don’t remember where I read this, but I do remember my reaction when I did, and it involved a snort, coupled with a wry smile, and a "yeah, right!"}

It’s the opposite, isn’t it?! We’re busier than ever these days!

Don’t get me wrong – this isn’t a piece on the evils of technology and how it’s ruining our peace. I actually love technology and what it has done for us. It has undoubtedly made things much easier and faster, but something that was created to save us time hasn’t served to make us any less busy. Hmmm..

And you know why?

Because we {often unconsciously} link being ‘busy’ with our sense of self-worth. For many of us, being busy is what gives us a sense of purpose and gives us our place in the world. It means we’re active, getting things done, making a difference. If you’re not busy, you’re not contributing.

Can you identify with that?

SIDE NOTE: You may not enjoy being busy {it can actually be very stressful} – but most of us would be able to find some level of truth that being busy satisfies something for us internally. That’s why we can sometimes wear it as a badge of honour as we try to ‘out-busy’ our friends. "What!? That’s nothing!!! Get a load of what I’ve got on.." 

Instead of saying something like that, imagine answering the "how’s things" question with "cruisy really! I haven’t got a lot on at the moment". 

Could you ever see yourself honestly being able to say that? Lol, I can’t!! {FYI, I fall prey to the ‘busy’ curse as much as anyone, so I am definitely not on a high horse in writing this}!

So, I can’t help but think that if technology saves us time, we must be filling our lives to the brim because of a deeper reason. 

And I think it's got to do with this..

Much of what is inadvertently communicated to us in our fast-paced lives is that we need to be productive every moment of the day, and if you’re not, your ‘self-worth’ is not worth much. This could mean that our need to be busy stems from a misguided belief that busy equates to purpose, contribution, and meaning. 

Now before you write this off as being psycho-babble, the above might not be a conscious thought process/decision that you’ve made or conclusion you’ve come to. Most of your behaviour is on autopilot, which is all driven by subconscious thought processes, so chances are you haven’t stopped to take the time to put two and two together on why you’re so busy and secretly get a sense of satisfaction at the same time as hating it {lol, you might even say you’ve been "too busy to think about it"!! See what I did there <wink>}. 

But back to being serious again {no more bad dad-jokes, I promise!}, all the research into stress, anxiety, burnout, etc. indicates that it’s IMPERATIVE that we slow down. 

So, sure, you can continue as you are being busy, busy, busy, but just be aware that it comes at a price. And that’s the point of truth for us all. For every action there is an equal and opposite reaction, and this holds true for your busyness. 

This means it’s not a case of "oh, taking time to rest!? That’d be nice", it’s a case of NEEDING to for the sake of your emotional health, mental health, and relationships. At the risk of sounding a bit ominous, if you don’t, you will find your breaking point {and it’s not pretty when you do!}. 

The catch?

Only you can work out what you can take out of your life to be less busy. But to offer you some free advice, start with having at least 1 hour EVERY day technology free

Disconnect from texts/calls/email/Facebook/TV and connect in with the immediate world around you – people, places, things. I bet you’ll find you come to relish in that blissful hour and anticipate its arrival every day.

When you work out how to invest time in yourself, your relationships, and your environment, you’ll be happier, healthier, and much better off for it. 

If you’d like to talk further about this, book a clarity call with me to learn more about my development program to help women find freedom from the funk and start flourishing, and associated coaching packages. 

Talk soon!

With love + joy
Cath xo

Schedule a complimentary Clarity Call today

Cath Doocey

Owner/Principal Psychologist

Flourish Boldy International

E: hello@flourishboldly.com

Helping women get unstuck and find freedom in LOVE ~ CAREER ~ LIFE

Catherine Doocey